It has been more than a week after the "not-so-dramtic" event but still, I'm suffering from the after-effect... I can't wake up for morning classes at all. My body just tells me to slp and skip the classes... I tried going for the 2nd half of the classes instead, but I failed, on both lessons. I sort of hate the feeling, but what can I do? I really feel the need to rest.. And even thou I had enough slp, I'll feel slpy/drowsy the whole day. It's really bad.. I can't even write well. But I'm slowly regaining the strength to write properly.. I'm glad.. I just hope this will be over very soon. It's disrupting my daily life. Even when I'm out, I nd to avoid crowds. Actually, I'm still fear walking among the crowd.. I'd rather walk take the long route.. Haiz... Basically, I feel like a weakling for the past week...

I really can't explain the boredom inside me... All day long, I'll ask people ard if they feel that life is too boring. Else if nt, I'll ask them if they ever thot they were suffering from depression. I duno wat's wrong with me... I just feel that I'm not the "normal" Eve anymore... What has changed? I'm searching for the answer myself. I just feel I nd smth to spike my life. What is the thing? I would like to know too... Recently, I can cry for nothing.. Really nothing... Probably I'm too stress, but what am I stress with? I'm not sure.. I duno how to describe these feelings of mine to anyone.. It's just undescribable. And I'm getting so impatient. Even if I can't get the notes or rhythm right while playing the guitar, I'll get frustrated with myself! It's not as if I've tried playing for long. It's only twice or so.. I'm really losing it! I nd help but I duno where to get it from. And if you are unhappy and can't understand why am I always writing my inner thots here rather than sharing with you, I'm sorry to say that, I have the freedom to write whatever I want in this space of mine! U know who u are. Get it clear, this is my space. I dun have to answer to anyone on whatever is written. And it is here and in my own private diary that I can express myself freely, without seeking any common understanding nor get interupted while writing my thots. I guess, most bloggers would agree with me..

Maybe we have never thought of being in a drama ourselves. But one day, when you experience it, you may start to believe that life itself is just like any drama that you are watching..

Recently, a fren's issue really makes me think... It's really too dramatic. But it had already happened. There was apparently nothing I can do to help. Cuz reality is always the most cruel thing on earth.. It made me think of the situation I'm in. It's really hard to confirm on anything.. Esp when dealing with people.. So scary... Anyway, I hope I can be there for the fren. Helping with whatever I can do.

A not-so-dramatic event happened to myself too. At the scene, I was asked the question if the settings are what I've always seen in movies/drama. Haha.. I bet most people would say 'yes'. I was so nervous before it started but after I went thru' it, I realise, it's not as bad as I imagine. But the days are hard to spend.. Probably people are envious of the ample time I have which I can slack or study. But I'm super bored. Sometimes, I just have no mood to study.. I only started to browse thru' a few pages today but dun even fully understand any crap! I'm starting to think that I'm falling so much behind everyone else. Everyone is forming study group to study.. But here I am, writing in my blog... Having stupid thoughts.. Feeling bored.. Life after citibank is really so different. I still miss working there.. I'm crazy as many will say.. I know. But I really miss the super stress up and busy schedules during those times...

I really would LOVE to
- get super busy
- be really tired
- have tight schedules
- know more friends
- have more outings
- earn enough money
- make more new sales
- eat curry
- eat DARK chocolates
- eat mutton nasi brani
- eat yam paste
- eat chocolate prata from Jalan Kayu
- eat beef noodles
- eat kimchi ramen
- eat aijisen ramen

And last but not least, go for a BLUE SKY AND SEA HOLIDAY!!!!